This short book will focus on marriage, and dating. I took a deep thought into marriage family and society of the last few years. Hopefully I can unwarp my random thoughts in manner you can understand

I strongly suggest that anyone panning on marriage and dating give deep thoughts as to the purpose and ultimate goal.

 There are 3 things we need for society

1, The architypes’ structure to aim for, pilers of society that produce the glue to keeps us working together with a common goal. These are the patriarchy matriarchy, and the hierarchy of competence/merit and sacrifice.

The greatest sacrifice we were all expected to take, the pillar, the most important act, is marriage.  Society grows out of families, and society must protect families. Without good families we can not have good societies.

I am excluding sacrifices for the society that may lead to disability and death in service.

2, farm and hunting. These are not just providers, but innovators, strategic thinkers and entrepreneurs. Cities exist due to the excess of farming.  As we move toward mega farms, are food security decreases.   As google handles 90% of all web searches, image 1 company producing 90% or our food. This is a whole other book. We must also protect and encourage the family farm.

3, social standards with generational aim, religion or social conscience standards

 The objects of Judaism and Christianity is to make you life outside of the human condition.  To learn how to control all your short term wants and whims, to help you focus on the best path of the future, and the community’s future, which may not be the as your own. Moreover, Christianity is based on sacrifice, yourself for others.

What makes me happy, how I feel can only weighed against the truth of your children’s grandchildren. Weather you made a good decision can only be weighed upon the moral success of your grandchildren.  The peace and prosperity of their lives is what your marriage aims for.

Wokeism will fail because it does not judge itself against the future. It has taken self identity to point of being god like. Save that for the end.

What is marriage?

A sacrificial union based on fidelity, mutual trust and respect.

Marriage is sacrifice to the point you live without committing transgression.

What does that mean?    

Sacrifice, you give until it hurts. You give without expecting a return. You give because it is for the benefit of union. Marriage is based on selfless giving without individual return because it is better for the union’s long-term prosperity.  You give up so that all others, or at least one other can receive.

This is why many people change, and they should. As I have it been heard it call, some people develop a married personality. If they are in a good marriage, then will be more confident, and more capable in some aspects for there life. They also loose aspects as is required to completely give yourself into the sacrificial union.

Marriage is union. A union is merger of which the result is greater than the sum of individuals. In a partnership is more like an intersection, you get a bit of both, thus 1+1=1.x .   A marriage union totally consumes both people upon entry with the desire to be greater than each could be individually.  It is like 1+1=x where x can be any number larger than 2.

When you get married you have to “be all in”.

Fidelity, it is binding agent, glue or clamps.  It keeps the union together. Activities that violate this, that try slither into, or escape out of the union are called cheating. They are trying to break the rules of marriage.

Mutal trust. If you can’t trust them with your life, trust the with every decision they make, then why? Trust means that you believe they are saying and doing what is true, and acting toward that. They make different decisions then you, but if they did it for they truly believed it was best for the union, and not lip service to silence you, then you are fine. If you can discuss it work it through with valid intentions, then you are good. Trust is where you put your feet. Without it you will fall.

Respect, they more than just valued equal, they fill you where are empty. You submit yourself their leadership in places you lack. This true for both persons in the relationship.  Your spouse is an image of yourself. The image of missing parts. You need them to be whole and grow into a bigger future.  “Love your wife as yourself” Jesus said.

I will only speak of conventional heterosexual marriage, as this is where my experience is.

To achieve the balance, this union, there are a few things that are required the matriarchy, the patriarchy and esteem.  You will need conflict resolution, the worst to be done is conflict avoidance. That can be the hardest part for many.

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